No!

How to learn to refuse?

THE DEFFECTION TO REFUSE TAKES A MULTIPLE OF PROBLEMS : unnecessary meetings, unnecessary business, a responsibility, constant fatigue and much more. What to do if you want to stop adapting to everyone, and how to learn to refuse? We will not promise quick success: the process will be long, but the result is worth it.

This is an important work. You have to analyze your behavior and feelings in those moments when instead of “no” you say: “Yes” as soon as you have a feeling that you agreed to something absolutely not close to you, unpleasant and undesirable – note how it happened . Better yet, record these moments: keep a diary, make notes on the phone, notepad, and the like. Mark what happened, who asked or suggested you, what feelings you had, what you thought and what you said out loud.

Who is harder for you to refuse?

Observe in what circumstances, in what circumstances it is most difficult for you to defend yourself. Maybe you will find that failures are most difficult to give in a particular area: at work, when communicating with relatives or in personal life. This is a reason to think about what is happening in this part of life, in relations with these people. What are your attitudes about work, friendship, marriage and relationships, family ties?

What feeling is pushing to say yes?

Maybe this feeling of shame or guilt. These feelings already spoil life, and in extreme cases it is simply dangerous: they force them to give in to manipulations, they can push and make them stay in an abusive relationship, tolerate mistreatment from relatives, friends, colleagues, agree to dangerous adventures or unprofitable offers – in a word , harm yourself.

Are you afraid that you will fall out of love?

Often, the fear of refusing is the fear of spoiling relationships, losing loved ones, and being alone. It seems to us that people will leave us if we stop giving up all the time. But it is important to realize that the “favorite” and “convenient” are completely different things.